Shit

The title says it all - so if you have a queasy stomach, don't read this - because it is quite literally all about shit!

Now every parent has their share of poop stories - we certainly have had ours over the years. There always seems to be that infamous time when a kid poops in the tub!

Marlie pooped in the tub and Jayson and I were so shocked we didn't know what to do - I think she was 9mo old. We finally discerned that getting a doggy poop bag was the best way to handle the situation! First time parent awesomeness at its best!

Samantha pooped in the tub when she was somewhere around 2 - and unfortunately for Marlie, she was in the tub! She moved extremely quickly out of the tub as she matter of factly stated "well I guess bathtime is over!" Ha!

Well Evan decided to join the club tonight and have his first poop in the tub. And in true boy fashion, he had to take this little milestone and do it multiple times "better" than his sisters! He pooped in the tub on the one night he was taking a bath with the girls - only Marlie was in the tub at the time and she didn't notice and went to reach for what she thought was a log part to her mermaid lagoon! Oh . . . Then as I get everyone out of the tub and wrapped in towels and decide bathtime will have to wait until the next night, the kids run out in their towels and I begin to spray a cleaner real quick . . . Only to have Marlie come running out screaming "Evan pooped in our room" - and as I stick my head around the corner I see evidence as Evan had stepped in said poop and was walking across the floor (ala Sam circa October 2010).

So then I put Evan on the potty and have Marlie stand guard to ensure he doesn't move as I gather the throw rug and towels that had been defiled. I then go back to clean up Evan and Marlie runs into the room to see what Sam is doing (FYI she was sitting quietly on her bed through the entire incident writing her numbers!). Marlie then comes running out screaming that Evan had smeared poop on Sams bedspread and that she sat in it - I swear on everything that I am that he was out of my sight for under 2 minutes - how this much damage occurred, I am completely uncertain.

Now I finish with Evan as Marlie runs in to sit on the sink - I go to the girls' room to see the smeared bedspread and as I go to reach for it, step in poop. This would be the first time that Sam opens her mouth through the entire process and says to me "guess you should've watched where you were walking" Seriously?!?

I now have a huge pile of shit covered laundry to do . . . But the only two thoughts I have at the end are:

1. Naturally Jayson would call in the middle of all of this and tell me he was going to be late - at which point I yell for a second and then just bust out laughing - you have to! Though my laughter probably made it seem a lot less "shitty" than it actually was!

2. I guess the combination of prunes for snack and a black bean and corn quesadilla for dinner yesterday finally caught up with Evan - note to self!

From my iPhone